Suddenly my whole perspective changed. I hadn't spoken to my parents in a few days which is normal, but the fact that I had been actively trying to get in touch to plan their trip, and hadn't heard back was strange. I called my mom on Skype and finally got in touch. I started ragging on her about not answering my calls, and what would she do if I wasn't an only child etc., the usual teasing I give my busy working mother, when I could tell something was wrong. She laughed but sounded tired and upset. I had to go to class, but I knew something bad was coming and we made a date to talk later that night.
A few hours later I learned my Nana was in Kidney failure, and would probably not make it through the holidays. After having a good family friend pass away while I was gone in October, I had a weird paranoia that something bad was going to happen while I was gone. Hearing this was like getting hit and not knowing how to react. I was stuck in a foreign country with no way to easily communicate with my family, and no way to see my Nana.
I will spare you all the details, but I ended up on a flight home on December 4th landing in JFK. My parents cancelled their trip, and I made emergency plans to leave. I needed to be home, the stress of everything was too much for me to handle being away.
I got to say goodbye two days before my grandmother passed way. December 7th, 2009 was the last day of a long a beautiful life that touched everyone who was a part of it. When I went to see her even as sick as she already was she asked about my trip and told me how lucky I was to be such a "world traveler".
Therefore I would like to dedicate my blog, and my experience as a whole to my Nana. I still have a whole in my chest from losing her, and it's something that won't be filled for a long time. I know how proud of me she was for expanding my outlook, and doing things that she wished she could have done in her lifetime. Her light and amazing sweetness is with me everyday.
Packing my bags and leaving Rome was bittersweet, and I wish I could have left under different circumstances. I gained so much from my experience and wouldn't trade my time abroad for anything. The amazing people, places, and experiences are things I will cherish for the rest of my life.
Anne M. McCabe
July 17th 1925- December 7th 2009
"Grieve not...nor speak of me with tears, but laugh and talk of me as though I were beside you. I loved you so...'twas Heaven here with you"